Thomas Albert Cotton

Each day is a special day, it has never been here before and can never return, we should celebrate it with a smile. A kind word and a good deed.
 

A tireless supporter of residents in Paulsgrove has died after 25 years of volunteer work for the community. Thomas Cotton, of Mousehole Road, Paulsgrove, Portsmouth, worked for the Hillside Youth Centre in Cheltenham Road, Paulsgrove, for four years. During more than 25 years living in the area he also volunteered for numerous community groups. He died aged 68 after a three month battle with a tumour of the pancreas. Mr Cotton leaves his wife Beryl, 71, daughters Lorraine, 43, Sandra, 41, Tricia, 39, and son Ray, 41. He also leaves 16 grandchildren and two great grandchildren.

He was born in June 1935. As an orphan, he was brought up by Barnardo's. Mr Cotton moved with his family to Portsmouth in 1976 and worked for several printing companies. He left printing in 1990 and, through his volunteer work; he decided to work full time for the community. In 1994 Mr Cotton took a job at Hillside Youth Centre. He worked there until his retirement in 1998. His daughter Sandra Brooks said: 'He was a very caring man who was always there if you had a problem. He was a great supporter of Paulsgrove.

Reproduced by permission The News, Thursday, September 4, 2003

Many Old Boys will remember Tom for his kindness and dedication to the work of the reunions. We all will sadly miss him. Tom was a great believer in the idea behind the reunions, and was a staunch supporter of the web site.

All that loved, respected and knew him will sorely miss him. On behalf of all the many that knew Tom we send our respect and condolence to his family.

Tom was at New Lodge Windsor and from the mid 90s Tom organised the Windsor reunion.

Tom along with his Brother Bill  were at Goldings in the late forties early fifties. Like his brother Bill who was a couple of years older, both were in Aberdeen House. Tom was in the printing department and went on to serve his apprenticeship at Goldings and was in digs in Hertford.

After leaving Goldings he obtained a job within the printing industry at Cambridge University press he then obtained a job in Norfolk were he stayed a number of years and then he relocated to the Portsmouth area.

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Email received from Bill Cotton.

MY BROTHER TOM

I woke up to life according as my memory serves me in a Barnardo Home called Honingham Hall near Norwich. I was not aware then that I had two brothers. Vaguely I remember being fostered in a Cambridgeshire village and my foster-mother pointing across the road and saying, "That's your brother over there." Apparently we were all in the same village but in different foster homes.

Between 6 and 8 years I was at Honingham, then I was sent to New Lodge, Windsor, where I was introduced to my two brothers: "This is your brother Tom." "Hullo", and we shook hands. Even at New Lodge we were kept apart by being placed in different 'houses', I was on Blue House, Len (oldest of the three by 15 months) was on Green House, and Tom, if my memory serves me correctly, on Yellow House. So we didn't even sleep in the same dormitory together, and our lives didn't interact as families are expected to. Nevertheless we were officially brothers and at least there was some attraction in the idea.

I went to Goldings at 13 ¾, Tom followed me a year or so later. As I write these thoughts, I find myself wishing that Tom was here to help me. He had an extraordinary capacity to remember things past. In latter years he would regale me with details I had long since forgotten. One of the most amusing was that on one occasion at New Lodge he had crept up behind me, as I was reading my accustomed book, snatched it from my hands and raced off, with me in full pursuit calling down curses on his head! I confessed I had totally forgotten the incident.

At Goldings we both went into printing. I was in the composer/keyboard department, Tom in the machine rooms doing the final printing. Tom took a great pride in being in the Army Cadet band, where he revelled in swinging the mace at the front.

He joined the air force under national service and trained as an officer's batman. I came to think he actually enjoyed. Whether that is so or not, it must have served him well in personal and family life.

Once again my memory falters. After leaving the services I went to work at the Cambridge University Press, and I am fairly sure that Tom joined me there. However, it was not for long because I left the CUP and went to train for Christian missionary work in South America.

With intermittent brief visits to UK this period of my life meant 20 years of having very little contact with Len and Tom. In fact the three of us were not at any point physically together for 27 years. What a loose-knit fragile 'family' we were.

But though we each went his own way, each married and had children, and lived as happy and satisfied families. Tom's was way the biggest with four children, three daughters and one son, and 15 grandchildren. On the latter score I once complained to him that it was an injustice that he should have 15 grandchildren, and I his older brother should have none. To which he wittily replied, "You can have half of mine if you like".

In those 20 years that we were separated, Tom became active in Trade Union activities and other local community activities in the well-known area of Paulsgrove, Portsmouth. He was, in other words, a man of considerable activity.

Not the least was his constant work on the Barnardo Old Boys' Guild, the Goldings annual Reunions, and the less annual New Lodge Reunions.

Finally, it was on Tom's initiative that we were able to investigate, with Barnardo's After-Care help, and also the Salvation Army, the whereabouts of our father and mother. This led to our eventual meeting mother and a half-brother, Philip.

More to follow,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

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Email from Toms old Housemaster:

I was shocked and saddened to hear of the death of Tom Cotton.  Tom was my "room boy" at Goldings and took very great care of the room.  He cleaned, made the bed, and, in the winter, kept a nice warm fire going in the hearth. He had the key to my room and also had my permission to be in the room at any time when I was otherwise occupied.  He was a quiet boy who, I think, enjoyed being able to go somewhere quiet to read and listen to the radio. Private moments like this were not easy to find in a noisy, bustling boys school and, I know he enjoyed those quiet times and he never abused the privilege. I know how much work Tom did for his fellow students and I am sure that he will be missed at the reunions.  My prayers and good wishes are with Tom's family and friends at this time. 

Regards.
Jack Johnstone. (Housemaster Aberdeen House.)

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I too am saddened and shocked to hear of the death of Tom Cotton.  Also born in 1935, I was a contemporary of Tom and his brother Bill in the printing department at Goldings. I must comment on Bill's recollection of his brother's life.  Barnardo's treatment of the Cotton brothers is typical of their cynical approach to family life  -  why not place the brothers in the same foster home?  What efforts did Barnardo's make to help the Cottons appreciate that they had what we all craved  -  a family.

Since leaving Goldings I have seen nothing to convince me that Barnardo's approach to us has changed. My sincere condolences to Tom's large family  -  it was a privilege to have known him in his early years.
 
Bob  Pegg  (1949-56).

A memorial bench has been placed in the Princess Diana Memorial Garden by the side of  The Barkingside Childrens church. Click here to view photos The wording is as follows:

1935 Tom Albert Cotton 2003
A member of the Dr Barnardo Family
Finis Coronat Opus

View a photo of Tom taken at Goldings, Aberdeen house